I suppose there are many people with such related problems albeit the hijabis or otherwise, non-Muslims and Muslims etc. Talking from a hijabi's perspective(yes, I wear the hijab/tudung. Surprise to those who didn't know! Well, you didn't know me enough), I do have problems with regards to hijab or wearing the hijab or adhering to the hijab code or with people having less than pleasant opinions or comments about it. After reading the article titled 'Who's got a problem with hijab?' and long trail of comments posted, it was comforting in a sense to know that I'm not the only one in this. It got me reflecting...
In the past when I was a little girl (it wasn't THAT long ago), my mother had me wearing the tudung or hijab. I've been wearing it ever since. But back then, I was clueless as to why I'm supposed to wear it. It was more of a habit then. As I grew older, there were so many questions with regards to hijab and etc. Why do I wear it? Am I doing it for Allah? Why is it that women have to cover up their heads and not men? How come there are other women of my faith not wearing the hijab? These are only a mere handful of questions constantly bubbling up in my mind. My mother who was my only source of knowledge with regards to this was also lacking the knowledge. My inquisitive nature just could not bear the state of being clueless. Even though I do attend madrasah every Sunday, there are some topics that are simply left to our own discovery. As such, I set out on my journey to discover more and more about my faith and hijab.
What I have found out thus far... To put it in a nutshell...
Wearing the hijab and following the hijab code helps me keep my Iman. You can say that it is like a constant reminder of Allah s.w.t. When I see others of my faith not covering up and prefering to adhere to the latest fashion trend as dictated by the rich few, it makes me feel sad. Sad for them actually. Why? Because they are trying to suppress a part of their religion; being modest suddenly became a fashion faux pas today? And I have heard one to many of the same excuse for not covering-up. Some examples... "We're modern women, why should we adhere to strict dressing laws?", "I've got all the time for this. I'll do it when I get older"or "I'm just not ready". I guess partly they think that being modern means dressing in the lastest fashion and being open-minded when it comes to everything(pardon my harsh generalisation). If you're open-minded about nudity, is it impossible to be open-minded about modesty? But I suppose it also takes time to learn and gain knowledge about Islam maybe thats why people are at different levels of piety. Even though, Allah has already designed your life even before you were born. Allah has also given you the power to make choices. I know this sounds confusing and I have been confused countless times about it. But Allah's knowledge is indeed beyond human comprehension.
Another thing that bothers me is that....Since I'm adorning the hijab, it does not mean that I think of myself as someone 'holier' than others. Of course there are the occasional slip-ups with my solat, the not-so-bad frequent pranks on people, sometimes screaming at my siblings, secretly wishing to disobey my parents. But aren't we all human? I never think that I'm better than anyone else because of what I wear. Wearing the hijab is my choice now. I could have rebelled against my parents' wishes and not wear the hijab and they cannot do anything about it. But now, the hijab has become a part of me. And I am happy.
What I have discovered has made me happy and peaceful within. Even though not all my questions were given answers to the fullest detail, I believe that being closer to the truth is better than being stagnant in thought.
Alhamdullilah for Allah has protected me.
~Salam~
